Stress Hijacking Your Thinking? Try The 10 Point Scale

Stress and uncertainty have a way of hijacking our thinking. Instead of clear decisions, we spiral into fight, flight, or freeze. I’ve been there myself. When I first launched my business, the pressure to succeed sometimes sent me straight into worst-case scenarios: “What if this fails? What if I can’t land clients? What if I’ve made a huge mistake?”

My clients know that spiral too — whether it’s a stalled project, a cryptic comment from a boss, or a career that feels stuck. The brain jumps to absolutes: never, always, impossible. That’s when I reach for a simple tool: the 10-point scale. It interrupts catastrophizing, restores perspective, and creates a path forward.

The 10-Point Scale Process

✍️ Step 1 Name the Concern:

This step isn’t just about venting. Naming the concern forces you to drill down on what’s really bothering you. Stress often arrives as a messy tangle of worries. When you reduce it to one clear statement, you can see the specific thought that’s been hijacking your focus. That clarity is the first step toward regaining control. Put it into a plain, simple sentence. Write it down or say it out loud without polishing or sugarcoating.

• “I’ll never get this project done.”

• “I have no ability to move ahead in my career.”

• “My boss doesn’t like me, and it’s going to block me from doing my job.”

📊 Step 2 Test the Truth:

Ask yourself: On a scale of 1 to 10, how true is this statement?

• 10 = Absolutely true.

• 1 = Absolutely untrue.

  Then test it. What evidence supports your number? What evidence challenges it? I often bring in an Obstacles and Dragons check here:

• Obstacles = the external, real-world factors standing in the way. These might be limited time, labor shortages, or financial constraints.

• Dragons = the internal forces that distort our view. These are things like self-doubt, untested assumptions about what others are thinking, or imagined scenarios that haven’t been tested in reality.

💡 Example: “My boss doesn’t like me, and it’s going to block my career.”

More often than not, when I ask clients to rate this, they land somewhere between an 8 and a 10 — because in the moment, the thought feels completely true. Let’s say this client chooses a 9.

• Evidence for the 9:
  • Their boss rarely gives positive feedback.
  • They’ve been excluded from one or two important meetings.

• Evidence against the 9:
  • Their performance reviews have been solid.
  • Their boss approved professional development funds for them this year.
  • Colleagues see their boss rely on them for tough assignments.

Now layer in Obstacles and Dragons:

• Obstacle: Their boss may truly be stretched for time and less available for one-on-one feedback.

• Dragon: They’ve assumed silence equals dislike — but that belief hasn’t been tested.

After reviewing this, the “9” often shifts downward — maybe to a 6 or even a 5 — opening space for more constructive thinking.

🎯 Step 3: Find a Tolerable Number:

Now ask: What number would feel “good enough” to move forward? You don’t need to jump from a 9 to a 1. Sometimes shifting from an 8 to a 5 is enough to regain momentum.

🛤️ Step 4: Build the Bridge:

You now have two points: where you are and where you need to be. The key question is: What actions will help me move from here to there?

💡 Example (continuing the boss scenario):

• You started at a 9, then shifted to a 6 after testing the truth.

• You decide that if you can get to a 4, you’ll feel steady enough to take constructive action.

What might help bridge that gap?

• Schedule a short check-in with your boss to clarify expectations.

• Ask directly for feedback on a recent project instead of assuming silence equals disapproval.

• Remind yourself of concrete evidence (positive reviews, funded development, trust on assignments).

• Share one professional goal with your boss to create a more forward-looking dialogue.

Each of these small actions chips away at the “dragon” of untested assumptions and gives you fresh evidence. That shift restores agency — and often, the number moves down again as the situation feels less paralyzing.

Why This Works

Stress and overwhelm shrink our thinking. We default to absolutes — never, always, impossible. The 10-point scale forces us to pause, clarify, and test those absolutes. Instead of being hijacked by stress, you begin making intentional choices.

• ✍️ Naming the concern brings clarity.

• 📊 Testing the truth brings perspective.

• 🎯 Identifying a tolerable number restores possibility.

• 🛤️ Building the bridge returns agency.

✨ Try this: The next time you feel stuck, write down the concern in one plain sentence. Place it on the scale. Then ask what it would take to move a few points closer to action. That shift — from tangled stress to concrete clarity — is often all it takes to move forward.