How to Deliver Bad News Effectively
Delivering Bad News Is a Skill. Winging It Is Not an Option.
If you’ve been in the workplace long enough, you’ve likely had to deliver hard news. And if you haven’t yet, you will. Maybe you’ve had to tell a colleague the project won’t be funded. Maybe you’ve had to explain a layoff, a mistake with consequences, or a decision that affects someone’s role, future, or sense of belonging.
I’ve been on both sides: the one giving the news, and the one receiving it. And here’s what I know to be true:
Delivering bad news well is a skill. Winging it is not an option.
When people are uncomfortable, they tend to avoid thinking about the conversation at all—until the last possible moment. Then they go in unprepared, unsure, and emotionally off-center. It doesn’t just make the conversation harder—it increases the chance that the message will be received with confusion, hurt, or resentment.
Whether you’re a leader or a team member, here are some essential principles that can help you show up with integrity and care when it matters most.
🧭 Get Yourself Grounded First
You can’t support someone else through difficult news if you haven’t taken the time to steady yourself first. Before the conversation, check in with yourself:
Have you had a chance to process your own emotions?
Are you calm and clear enough to stay present?
Do you fully understand the message you’re delivering and your role in it?
A grounded mindset allows you to focus on what matters: the information being shared and the experience of the person receiving it. When your attention stays there, you’re able to listen, respond, and guide with care and clarity.
If your focus drifts toward your own discomfort—as the person delivering the message—you risk making the conversation about you, rather than the person most impacted. That’s when things get muddy or emotionally off balance.
And while you may absolutely need space to process this experience yourself, this conversation is not the place for that. Make time before or after to reflect, debrief, or seek support—but not during the moment that belongs to someone else.
When you’re grounded, you bring steadiness to a difficult moment. That’s not just a leadership skill—it’s an act of respect.
📝 Plan What You’re Going to Say—and Why
Once you’ve centered yourself, it’s time to prepare the message. If you’re dreading the conversation, you might tell yourself you’ll “figure it out in the moment.” But difficult conversations are not the place to improvise. Avoiding the work of preparation is avoiding your responsibility. If the conversation matters enough to cause discomfort, it matters enough to plan.
Take time—even just ten focused minutes—to get clear:
What is the core message I need to deliver?
Why now?
What do I need this person to understand and take away from the conversation?
What tone do I want to set?
What questions do I anticipate—and how will I respond?
Write it down if needed. Jot down bullet points. Emotion—yours or theirs—can derail clarity. Your job is to stay anchored in the message.
And as you prepare, be realistic about the potential reaction. If you anticipate someone may respond with hostility or emotional volatility, take steps to ensure you are not put in a position of risk. That might mean having another person present, choosing a setting where you feel physically and psychologically safe, or conducting the conversation in a controlled environment like a video meeting.
Respect goes both ways—and preparation includes protecting yourself.
🕰️ Timing and Setting Matter More Than You Think
A well-prepared message can still fall flat if it’s delivered poorly. How, where, and when you deliver difficult news says just as much as the message itself.
Will this be in person, on video, or over the phone?
Who will be in the room?
Will the person have space to process—without being rushed or observed?
Is the setting private and respectful?
Even if your time is limited, don’t let logistics dictate carelessness. A surprise phone call at 4:55 p.m. on a Friday is not thoughtful timing. Nor is delivering a tough message mid-meeting with no warning.
And remember: in this era of social media and workplace transparency, your conversation may be recorded or shared. That’s not a reason to avoid authenticity—but it is a reason to speak with care and professionalism you’d stand behind if the moment were made public.
💬 Expect Emotion—And Know How You’ll Handle It
No matter how carefully you plan, hard news will often bring a strong emotional response. You may see silence, tears, frustration, or anger. That doesn’t mean you’ve done it wrong—it means you’ve said something that matters.
Your job isn’t to control the reaction. It’s to stay grounded, present, and steady enough to hold space for whatever emerges.
In those moments, people need to feel seen. Especially when the news touches something deeply personal—like their professional identity, financial security, or sense of belonging.
You don’t need the perfect phrase. But you do need to acknowledge what’s real: the news is hard, and strong emotional responses—feeling upset, blindsided, disappointed, or even angry—are completely valid. When you recognize that those reactions are expected, you help take some of the sting out of the moment. You reduce the shame or embarrassment people often feel about “losing composure” at work, and that alone can help someone begin to process and move forward.
That said, compassion doesn’t mean losing yourself in the process. Staying present also means maintaining boundaries. Just as you’re managing your own emotions with professionalism, you have a right to expect that the conversation stays respectful.
All emotions are valid. Not all behaviors are.
You can offer calm and empathy without absorbing blame or tolerating abusive behavior. If a conversation crosses a line—becomes personally hostile or unsafe—you’re allowed to pause, reset, or step away.
The goal isn’t to suppress emotion. The goal is to protect the integrity of the conversation—for both people involved.
📌 Clarify the Essentials—and Don’t Lose the Thread
Emotions can muddy the message—so it’s essential to stay focused. You might start with the right intention and end up buried in over-explanation, disclaimers, or tangents. Before the conversation, make sure you’re clear on:
The must-know facts: ideally shared verbally and followed up in writing.
Any official documents: make sure their delivery is part of the plan.
What context is appropriate: If this is part of a larger shift, say so. If there’s reassurance you can offer honestly (“we don’t expect further layoffs,” “this isn’t a reflection of your performance”), include it.
Don’t overdo it. But don’t leave people confused, either.
🔄 Know What Happens Next
Delivering difficult news isn’t a one-and-done task. It’s a transition point—and what happens after matters just as much. Ask yourself:
What will the person need right after the conversation?
Are there resources you can offer or people they can talk to?
What’s the follow-up plan?
Will someone check in, answer questions, or support them moving forward?
If you’re not the one to provide next steps, make sure you know who is.
Even simple acts of follow-through—emailing a summary, connecting them with someone who can help, offering time for questions—can signal care, respect, and integrity.
🎯 You Can’t Control Their Reaction—But You Can Control How You Show Up
No matter how well you prepare, people may still be upset. That’s part of the work.
But you can control whether you’ve shown up with clarity, empathy, and professionalism. You can control whether you’ve avoided blame, stayed present, and handled the conversation in a way that honors the other person’s dignity. That’s what matters.
And it’s why delivering difficult news isn’t just a task—it’s a leadership skill. One that deserves your full attention and your very best effort.